After years of challenges and moments of despair, I
felt like a failure. I asked God if I would ever get to the place where I could
really be use by Him again. I wondered because the sense of discouragement seemed
to clothe me securely.
The Lord responded with a picture of a beautiful pearl
necklace in my mind’s eye and spoke gently to my spirit:
“The circumstances you have gone through trouble
you. Some circumstances were caused by your stubbornness and others were
demonic assignments. Nevertheless, I have been with you through them all. And
now, I need you to grasp each of those lessons in a fresh way.
“Thank you Lord. Your words calm my heart,” I said.
But then I asked another question, "How will I ever get rid of this guilt
and shame?
"When you are ready to put up your shield of
faith to quench all the enemy's negative thought-filled reminders of your past
and are willing to let go of your obsession with self-condemnation, then you can and will move on.
Afterwards, I will be able to grace-fill-ly
knot and secure all those pearls together and secure them around your neck with
the blood of Jesus.”
I have wasted so much time meditating on ‘what ifs’
or ‘I should have known better’. Life
should have been so different. Then I realized the 'shoulds keep the shame alive'. Yet, again I realized even if I had made
wiser decisions then, I would have eventually made an error in judgment later.
Having this special pearl necklace reminds me…all
is not lost. God intends to use everything I do right or wrong for His glory. When
I get off track, God still marks the journey as valuable and that brings me
joy.
How about your pearls that came at a great price?
Will you allow God to line them up and show you off? God is so proud of you and
the way you hung on to Him. You may feel disqualified. Don’t despair! God plans
to use all those 'unseemly parts' to
minister grace and hope to many.
Go ahead…quench the enemy’s thoughts of failure, pick
a pearl and courageously share how God changed your life.
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